i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
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