Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
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