I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize