So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Randomize
