Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
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