so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
Randomize
