i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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