I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Go christen that room with your naked body.
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
