i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Randomize
