ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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