i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
