Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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