Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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