is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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