i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Randomize
