Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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