Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
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