I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
