I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
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