...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i'm sleeping with myself tonight because i remember my name and i won't regret it in the morning. sorry.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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