I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
