shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize
