I want to have your abortion
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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