I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
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