Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Randomize
