I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I need to wash the frat house off of me
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
Randomize
