I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
