508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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