I smell stomach acid.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
Randomize
