I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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