Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I feel like you're the sexual bearcat I've always wanted to be.
Randomize
