One girl and one boy is just not enough.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
