I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
Randomize
