There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
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