This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
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