His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
