Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
After I finished inserting the catheter he said he thought my name was familiar. Didn't have the nerve to tell him he was my fifth grade teacher.
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Randomize
