Dual....:-)
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Randomize
