Christians are straight up FREAKS
I woke up on my floor...
I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
