If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
Randomize
