After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Less talking, more tequila
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
Randomize
