I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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