I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
