I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
Randomize
