im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
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