I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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