at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
