Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
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