I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Randomize
