i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
