How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
Randomize